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Goal of Cooperative Parenting: Cooperative Parenting focuses on the relationships between and among adults who are separated, divorced, or never married who are rearing their children in two households. The overarching goal is to protect and support children in these homes by teaching parents (and other caregivers) information and skills to: A) Reduce or eliminate conflict between parents. B) Establish or enhance communication between parents. C) Decrease reliance on family court for dispute resolution. D) Maximize participants' ability to accept personal responsibility for their relationship with the other parent. E) Provide practical skills for extinguishing hostility and promoting cooperation between (among) adults. Cooperative Parenting Introduction and History: Cooperative Parenting was created in 2000 by Shari Delisle, Ph.D. to expand the resources available to families of divorce and those engaged in legal disputes in the Family Courts. Initially Cooperative Parenting (formerly kown as Parents' Turn) was created because parents entering other kids programs were so absorbed in their struggles with the other parent, they were not ready or able to focus on their children. Cooperative Parenting is a three week "intensive: (7.5 hours) in which parents meet once a week for three weeks. Tuition for Cooperative Parenting is "sliding scale" and based on household income of parent participants. 40% of Cooperative Parenting participants attend on scholarship ($15 per session). The tuition schedule can be found on the registration form. To date, Dr. Delisle teaches all of the Cooperative Parenting classes personally which assures participating parents that workshop content is consistent. This is an important issue for parents who want to be assured that their co-parent is learning exactly the same information they are. Cooperative Parenting was created for these reasons: 1)
To prepare adults
for other programs where the focus is on the children
during and following divorce or a custody dispute. 4) To make parent education more widely available to the thousands of San Diego parents rearing children in dual households. Since May 2000, hundreds of Cooperative Parenting workshops have been provided in the following locations: Chula Vista, San Diego, La Mesa, Escondido, Carlsbad and Encinitas. Overview: Parents do not attend the same workshop with one another. Each one must register for different workshops but a parent can attend a workshop with a current spouse, partner or grandparent. The Cooperative Parenting workshops offer a compassionate, tough learning environment where each parent (or participant) must confront his or her role in the destructive cycle of combative co-parenting. Using kindly confrontation, the curriculum focuses on these key issues: 1) Forcefully communicates the damage children suffer when they (or caregivers) are in conflict. 2) Challenges each participant to change their attitude and behavior toward co-parent. 3) Holds each parent accountable for his or her progress (or lack of progress) during the course. 4) Provides simple, effective strategies for effective self management to end hostility, and initiate or improve communication with co-parent. 5) Offers practical techniques for developing a cordial "business" relationship with the co-parent. 6) Encourages parents to assume personal responsibility while abandoning efforts to change the other parent. A variety of teaching techniques are used to enhance learning: lecture, videos, case studies, role plays, individual reporting, group brainstorming for solutions to individual problems and traditional group therapy techniques. Each participant receives a 40 page handout which they refer to and keep following class. Group size ranges from 5 - 20 participants. The curriculum is arranged so that a parent can easily "make up" a session in another workshop if he or she must be absent for a session. Parents must complete all three sessions and have tuition paid before receiving a graduation certificate (see attached). Referral Process: Within 24 hours of a call to the Cooperative Parenting office, a referral/registration packet is mailed out. To register for a workshop, a parent calls the Cooperative Parenting office and indicates which workshop he or she wishes to attend. A confirming letter is mailed out within 24 hours. This means that a parent can be enrolled in a workshop and seated in a classroom soon after the first contact with the Cooperative Parenting office. At least four workshops are offered each month and in most cases, parents can enroll in their "first choice" workshop. Parents complete two questionnaires. During the first ten minutes of the first session, they fill out a three page self report that provides instructor information, but also begins the process of self analysis. At graduation, parents complete a course assessment to monitor workshop impact on attendees. Graduate Feedback: Graduate evaluations have been completed since the first workshop. Some sample feedback:
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